NASEEHAT: Kamiyaab Shadi-shuda Zindagi kaise?

by Sajid Holy

Aksar qisson me aisa hota hai ki shadi ka maqsad hi couple samaj nahi paati, ya maturity nahi hoti, chhoti chhoti baato me bardasht karne ki samaj aur aql nahi hoti..

Aur jo tum mein be-nikaah hon unka nikaah kar diya karo, aur jo tumhaare ghulaam aur laundiyan nek hon unka bhi, agar woh muflis honge to Allah apne fazl se khush-haal kar dega, aur woh bahut wus’at walaa aur khoob janne wala hai.”
(Qur’an Surah an-Noor 24:32)

Insan ke liye Allah ne uska rizk muqaddar kar diya hai. Jis tarha uski maut uski taaq me rahti hai, usi tarha uska rizk uske pichhe pichhe laga rahta hai. Nikaah karna barkat aur rizk laata hai jaise ki surah an Noor me bataya gaya hai. Agar shaadi ke baad halaat tang ho to shauhar biwi ko sabr ka daman thaame rakhna chahiye, halal tareeke se rizk talash karne ki koshish karna chahiye aur Allah se mayoos nahi hona chahiye kyon ki mayoosi kufr hai.

Har mushkil ke baad aasani hoti hai. Insan ko aur khusoosan ek musalman ko chahiye ki woh halal rizk ki talash me hattal imkaan jaddo jahad kare, susti aur kahili aur duniya parasti chhode aur Allah par kaamil bharosa rakhe, kyonki agar woh aisa karega to jaise ki hadees ka mafhoom hai

“Umar bin Khattab (Radi Allahu Anhu) Se Riwayat Hai Ki Rasool’Allah (Sallallahu Alaihay Wasallam) Ne farmaya

“Agar Tum Allah Par Is Tarah Bharosa Karo Jis Tarah Bharosa Karne Ka Haq Hai To Woh (Allah) Tumhe Is Tarah Rizq Dega, Jis Tarah Parindo Ko Rizq Deta Hai , Subah Ko Wo Bhukhe Nikalte Hain Aur Sham Ko Wo Pet Bhar Kar Wapas Aate Hain.”

(Jami’at Tirmidhi, Vol 2, Hadith no. 225)

Zaroorat hai ki woh tawakkal al-Allah ko thaame rakhe.

Auraton ko bhi chahiye ki woh apne shahuhar ki hausla afzaayi kare, beja israaf na kare, aur qana’at (contentment) se kaam le, bina zaroorat ki chizo ka mutalba na kare, fashionparasti se gurez kare, kharch karne me hudood paar na kare. Agar woh aisa karti hai to woh Allah ki ek mukarrab bandi ban jaati hai. Aur agar woh aisa na karegi, to phir darr hai ki ghar ke laazim akhrajaat ke alawa doosri zarooraton ko poora karne ke liye shauhar kisi ke saamne hath phailaye, karz le ya haram rizk ka intekhab kare jo bada gunah hai aur is gunhah me biwi bhi jane anjaane shamil ho jayegi.

Hadees me jaha aata hai ki jo aadmi nikah ki istetaa’at na rakhta ho woh roze rakhe (taaqi apni nafsani khwahishat par qaboo paa sake) aur isi tarha Surah An-Noor me jaha aaya hai (mafhoom) ki agar “woh ghareeb ho to Allah unhe apne fazl ke daulatmand bana dega”, iski tashreeh me Imam Bukhari rahimahumullah ne ek khaas baab (chapter) bandha hai, ““Chapter on marriage of one who is in financial difficulty” (Maali iste’ta’at na rakhne walon ki shaadiyan) jiske zariye ulema ne samjhaya hai ki maujooda ghurbat ki halat insan ke liye shaadi na karne ki wajah nahi hoti.

Nabi sallallahu alahi wa sallam ke daur me mash’hoor hai ki aise sahaba jinke paas tan dhankne ke liye poore kapda na the unki bhi Nikah karwayi gayi aur ghulam mard aur aurato ki bhi shadiyan karwayi gayi. isse yeh sabit hua ki jo insan shaadi ke aur uske baad ki zindagi ke akhrajaat uthane ki isteta’at rakhta ho use Nikah karne par jaha islam ne ubhara hai, wahin jo maali taur par isteta’at nahi rakhta use shaadi karne se roka bhi nahi gaya hai, kyonki agar woh aisa karega, to phir darr hai ki kahi zina ki taraf na chala jaye aur doosri taraf Allah rizk ka maalik hai, aur Allah apne bando ke sath waisa hi mamla karta hai jaise ki banda Allah se tawakko rakhta hai.

Muashre me aise log hone chahiye jo ghareeb tabke ke musalmano ko ghar basane me aur use baad chhota mota karobar setup karne me madad karen. Insano ki aksariyat apne apne mamlaat me mast aur magan khudgarz nazar aati hai, aisa nahi hona chahiye kyon ki yeh bhi ek musalman ki social aur moral responsibility hai.

Iska ek aur pahlu yeh hai ki shaadi se pahle ek musalman mard apne aap ko education, talent aur mehnat ke zariye sanwarne ki koshish kare aur jaddo jahad kare kyonki shaadi sirf zindagi ke maze uthane aur lutf lene aur sath sath rahne ka naam nahi balki uske sath sath ek aham zimmedari uske kaandho par aati hai.

Aur in sab chizo ke baad ek ahamtareen pahlu yeh bhi hai ki maa baap ko chahiye ki jab bachche baaligh ho jayen to woh unki is tarha tarbiyat karen aur shauhar o biwi ke aapasi ehkaamaat se unke ilm me izafa karen taaki aane wali zindagi woh samajhdari se guzar saken. Aksar qisson me aisa hota hai ki shadi ka maqsad hi couple samaj nahi paati, ya maturity nahi hoti, chhoti chhoti baato me bardasht karne ki samaj aur aql nahi hoti, jiski wajah se ya to ghar toot jate hain, talaq aur khula ki naubat aa jati hai, ya to biwi apne mayke jaa kar baith jati hai phir shauhar ki zindagi zahar ban jati hai, bachcho ka mustaqbil andhere me chala jaata hai aur walidain jinho ne badi khushi se apne bachcho ka ghar sanwarne ke liye unki shadiyan karwayi thi woh muashre me bewajah badnaam ho jate hai.

Isliye shaadi byah ke preparations me dar’asl khubsurat kapde, marriage hall ki bookings, lazeez khane aur decorative furniture nahi balki tarbiyat ka pahlu zyada aham hai, taki aane wali zindagi me ghar ki buniyad mazboot ho. Aur yeh tab mumkin hai jab maa baap khud bhi aapas me sabr o qana’at ke sath ba’akhlaq aur ba’qirdaar zindagi basar karen, kyonki bachche unko dekh kar sikhenge aur zindagi ka ek nazariya – ek perspective unke samne wazeh hoga ki zindgi is tarha guzari jaye.

Allah se dua hai ki jinki shadiyan nahi hui ya nahi ho pa rahi, aur jo shadi shuda log tangdasti me mubtala hai, Allah un sab ke masail ko hal farmaye aur mualmaano ke rizk me khair o barkat ata farmaye. Aamin.